Miracle #29 - Being The Light And Shining The Light
I was afraid of the dark until I was 36 years old.
I seriously would not get of bed for any reason at night. If I had to pee, I would wait until morning rather than "face my fear".
Soon after my son was born, however, I awoke in the middle of the night to hear him crying. It seemed like his voice was coming from high above his bassinet - as if he were floating in the air.
I got the creeps and did not want to get out of bed to check on him.
There was a battle inside of me between my fear and my maternal instinct, which insisted that I needed to put my own desires aside and care for him.
I got out of bed and crossed the room to his bassinet, my heart pounding.
He was not floating in the air but laying in bed, crying.
I picked him up to comfort him, and as a result of that one act, my fear of the dark disappeared for the next 20 years!
A Course in Miracles talks a lot about the light and the darkness. It says:
If you can stand aside from the ego by ever so little, you will have no difficulty in recognizing that its opposition and its fears are meaningless.
I believe that this happened when I put my son's needs ahead of my own.
This act of "standing aside from the ego" showed me that my fear of the dark was baseless, and, once I saw that, my fear just evaporated into thin air.
ACIM also says that we cannot see in darkness and we cannot make light. We need to recognize that light is within, not without (outside of us).
We must go within, and make an effort to find the light there in order for it to shine in us and out of us.
If you grew up in a Christian church, you probably learned a song that went like this: "This little light of mine, I'm going to let it shine."
The song is based on a passage from the Bible that says:
You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." - Matthew 5:14-16
ACIM says that holding onto complaints, criticisms, and problems is what prevents us from seeing the light.
When we choose to let go of our grievances, the light in us naturally shines out through no effort on our part.
We feel lighter, happier, and more relaxed.
Those who come into contact with us sense this, even if they do not understand it.
When we choose to see our brothers with Christ vision - as perfect and whole - instead of focusing on their faults, we are able to see the light in them as well.
Last year, it seemed like my fear of the darkness had slowly crept back into my life.
I would get out of bed in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, then be afraid the reach around and flush the toilet. My mind would start to project that that there was something scary behind me.
When I mentioned this to my husband, his solution was so simple, I was flabbergasted that I had not thought of it myself. He said: why don't you just turn the bathroom light on?
The ego wants us to think that our problems are too difficult to be solved, different from another's and more complicated or special.
The truth is that there is only one problem and one solution.
We simply need to be willing to turn away from the ego-thought-stream and choose to think about God/Love/Light/Joy instead.
We need to be willing to ask the Holy Spirit for help.
We need to be willing to trust that God's will for us is perfect happiness.
We need to not just believe, but to know that we are the light of the world.
We just need to "flip the switch on" in our mind and turn towards the light!
Thank You, Holy Spirit
My grievances hide the light of the world in me. - Workbook lesson #6